When was the last time you felt completely stressed out?
Has it been a while? Was it earlier this week? Do you live under the constant weight of intense stress?
The good news, if you want to call it that, is that to live in America as a stressed-out person in America is normal. So if you feel like you’re the only one in line at Starbucks on the brink of a nervous breakdown, take heart. You’ve probably got friends there who will breakdown with you.
The 2012 Stress in America survey actually found that almost everyone says their own stress level is higher than what they believe is healthy. Beyond that, about 20% of people report living with extreme stress.
Think about that. At our offices, our churches, the ballfields – everyone is living with more stress than they think is healthy. And 1 out of every 5 people we see is almost at their wit’s end because of stress.
The causes of stress
What causes all that stress?
These three factors ranked among the top causes of stress:
- money
- work
- family responsibilities
Tackling stress
The truly good news is that we’re not just living with that stress. Most people are taking steps to make things better. Sixty percent of people, in fact, have taken steps to reduce their stress.
The trouble is, even though a lot of us are taking steps to reduce our stress, we don’t think think we’re doing a good job. Only 37% of people say they’re really succeeding at reducing stress.
Meanwhile, the people working to reduce stress but not hitting the mark probably feel bad about not making progress, which in turn causes more stress. It’s a vicious cycle.
What do we do?
We can keep doing what we’re already doing to manage stress. Most people report doing these types of things:
- exercising
- listening to music
- reading
- watching TV
- eating
- drinking alcohol
Another way forward might be to deal with stress before it happens. Don’t even let it in the front door.
How do we do that?
Get really good at saying no.
Remember that most of the stress people report relates to money, work, and family responsibilities. Think about how much stress we could avoid if we just formed a stronger habit of saying no to ourselves and other people.
Take a look at this great blog called Nine Practices to Help You Say No from the Harvard Business Review. It’s jam-packed with practical advice that bankers, engineers, work-at-home moms, pastors and police officers – anyone – can use.
Among the insights in the blog is that saying no to something is a statement of your values. When you say no to one thing, you say yes to another thing that you value more at the same time.
Saying no is what keeps us from spinning the web of commitments that keeps us stressed out. We can’t always say no, but we can probably say no more than we think we can.
Are you stressed out?
What about you? Do you live in the slow cooker of stress that most people report living in? What types of things stress you out?
Do you live on the edge? Are you part of the 20% who feel overwhelmed by stress?
Do you think getting good at saying no would help reduce your stress?
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